~(gail)~Art by James Morgan
Snippets on works in progress…any comments welcome, especially what grabs you or leaves you cold.
“From where you sit, it may seem that certain people should know better. People are who they are and do what they do whether or not you like it or agree with them. We each have different lessons to learn. We each take a different path to our lessons.” ~ Iyanla Vanzant
So true, we each walk our own path. Sometimes, it is completely alone. Often though, they journey alongside us for a time. Teaching us, loving us, challenging us, hindering or stopping us for a time. Our mission is to keep moving though…we are significant!
How that significance plays out depends on who we know we are inside, That when we reflect it outside we bring a depth of personality/character that changes all who come in contact with us. We choose! No one else has that right or power over us unless we give it to them.
How many times in my childhood….how many times in YOUR childhood when we did not have a say in what was said or done to us, were we so diminished, demoralised and burdened by other peoples view of who we should be?
I struggled with this, my perception of who I knew I was and who I was told I was could have enslaved me in such a negative way. I chose to stand alone and be different, not part of the ‘in crowd’ and it was lonely, hard slog and behind my smile a heart aching to be loved for me and accepting that some people never would. What a revelation! It was that which gave me the courage to just be me, I’m ok, a strong woman who is a survivor but also a resolution to always be true to myself. That is the essence of true freedom!
When you go against who you are…it causes such an unease to your Spirit…It WILL destroy you and you will become a shadow of someone elses creating.
Who did you see as a child? What dream was given you? Are you living it? If not…Why?
Remember that people will reflect back who they see themselves to be on the inside, they will not all have chosen to be significant and so will be threatened by you. Shine anyway! Recognize those ‘words of advice’ and weigh them thoroughly before accepting them as your truth.
I have learned to love them even though I don’t agree with them. That is the key. To love and always show kindness to all. I’m not perfect, I have my times of deep hurting but I have also learned to not carry/accept others emotional wounds/scars as my own. Learn from them…yes BUT do not allow yourself to be a dumping ground.
#StandStrong and become all you know in your heart, in your core self that you are meant to be. I believe in you! I ❤ You.
#Dream #Create #Be
Still smiling to herself, Jenna returned to the melee that was breakfast time at the O’Brien’s. Waka, their three-year-old son was busy demolishing his weetbix and milk, whilst Waimania, their one year old daughter sat in her high chair watching the antics of Waka. Jenna felt so blest and contented. Life is so perfect, great husband, great kids, and an awesome career, what could go wrong? Nothing! Just stop this pessimism girl, don’t you dare to allow it spoil this Day! She thought to herself.
Mickey’s interview could be the start of a whole new career in TV, and the upcoming release of her Novel would cap off the hard work by both of them over the last three years.
‘Right, I’m just about ready’ Micky said entering the kitchen, ‘How do I look?’
‘Fine, really handsome as usual Darling’ Jenna replied.
‘Do you still want me to drop off the Children at day
care?’ Micky said grinning at Waka.
‘Yeah, that would be great; I’m expecting Nic in about 45 minutes with the Manuscript adjustments for James. Dropping off these two rascals would so help. I know how much Waka loves Daddy taking him to Day- Care.’
‘Cool, Daddy take me’ Waka shouted! Both Micky and Jenna laughed. Fifteen minutes later, everyone was ready to go.
‘Jen, just leave the car seats for the kids in your car, and I’ll take it instead of mine, OK.’ Micky called from the office.
‘Sure Honey.’ she said as she hurried the children out to her car. She settled them in and gave each one a big kiss, ‘Be good for Daddy you two.’ They both giggled and waved good-bye. Micky came out looking confident and calm, she kissed him soundly and
wished him luck. Jenna waited by the front door to wave them away. Micky gave her one last smile and turned the engine over. Nothing prepared her, or had warned Micky of the impending explosions. Time seemed to stretch, Jenna watched in horror as the car bomb ripped apart all that she loved. It is a sight that would haunt her for years. Jenna was thrown back through the front door amidst shattering wood and glass, her last memory before unconsciousness was that of flames engulfing the Car, her family, and her life.
Another beautiful afternoon, Jenna had decided to take Lisa out to one of her favourite places.
‘How far to the lookout Jen’ Lisa asked.
‘About 20 minutes, I can’t believe that you have lived here this long and not been out here yet’ Jenna exclaimed! They needed the privacy of this secluded place to go over all the new evidence Lisa had picked up over the last four weeks or so, especially the conversation with Nicole earlier in the day. Lisa could tell it had been a harrowing exchange by Jenna’ anger when she’d picked her up from her flat in Kew, Jenna had been meaning to meet at her place but had gone for a walk along St Clair to St Kilda beach so she could cool off and think. She had called Lisa on her cell, there was another reason for the trip up to the lookout. How the hell am I going to tell Lisa about my fears concerning Tamati and me? Is she going to be OK with what’s happening between her cousin and me? After all that has happened, this is all so sudden, Jeez, I’m still so shocked and feel so guilty about it. How can I betray Micky like this! Jenna struggled with her fears as Lisa chatted away.
‘Damn! I’ve forgotten my Jacket!’ Lisa exclaimed.
‘That’s OK Lisa, you can borrow mine’ Jenna offered.
‘Ta, I still find it hard to get use to Dunedin weather, it is so changeable and at times a damn site colder than up North’ Lisa laughed. ‘Well, you were right Jenna, it is a beautiful view of the City’ Lisa said as Jenna pulled into the gravel car park. Turning off
the ignition and undoing her belt, Jenna reached over into the back seat and retrieved her treasured ‘Blue and Gold’ Otago Rugby jacket. They both got out and walked around to the front of the BMW. Jenna took a moment to again thank God or Providence for bringing this amazing Woman into her shattered life. Lisa had become her lifeline through those dark hours and days following her arrest and incarceration.
‘Ok Lisa, You got me! I’m intrigued. Tell me everything and you better not leave anything out. I can handle just about anything now. After all, how many more heartaches can I stand ‘til the truth wills out. Damned if I know but I won’t shy away from the pain. Hey, what’s the worst thing that could happen now’. Jenna laughed as she turned her face towards the view. The shot rang out, in a split second as she turned back at the sound, the image of Lisa’ beautiful face exploded over her body, as Lisa’ body slumped toward her… she recoiled in horror. Screaming she stumbled backwards, tripping she fell hard. A slow, satisfied smile graced The Lady in Blacks’ face. ‘Ah finally I got you Jenna! Die Bitch! DIE!.’ she laughed, she didn’t bother to wait around but quickly went back to her car which was off the main road, out of sight of anyone coming from the city.